1.7.08

Istanbul Pride


This year I finally made it to Istanbul pride, and I am glad I did! The event was a great success: a happy celebration of the local community. Probably more than a celebration the pride was of great political value for the local community. Being visible in big numbers is still an important tool for showing the very existence of the community.
Tonight I went with a little boat on the Turkish canals together with some friends. I think that's one of the greatest things to do when living in Amsterdam.

26.6.08

Thoughts

Today is the first day of the rest of my life. Often I have been thinking this, and once when I still kept a diary, I even wrote these words. The credo always came to mind whenever I am unsatisfied with the situation I find myself in, and I feel a need for change. Regardless whether I feel I am in the need of a better condition, I want a new job, orI want to move or to loose weight: this credo always is an inner order for action.

And still, I frequently dream of how things in life could be better. In bad periods I occupy my mind with such pointless thoughts. Sometimes I start to plan actions, write down new years resolutions and share my intentions widely with friends. All these preparations are necessary to ensure that I truly realise the dream I have. But friends now that intentions often remain intentions. In better periods I tend to forget the dreams I have, and I realise that I like what I'm doing.



"Action speaks louder than words," as Mark Twain wrote, seems rationally a more attractive credo. It is strange but true: most good things in my life occur rather just because they happen, not because they are long time desired or even planned. But these things eventually often are the result of who you really are. Which often makes me wonder: are you the result of what you do, or are you the result of what you want to do.

22.6.08

Double loyalty

Well Mr. Hiddink, I think it's time for you to hand in your Dutch passport. After the victory of 'your' Russian team last night, it now is time to show where your loyalty stays....with Russia or with your home country!

Strange, I haven't heard anyone saying this. And this whereas not so long ago the debate on whether immigrants should be loyal to one country only dominated the political debate for a long time. Many politicians said that immigrants should hand in the passport of their home country, if they wanted to stay in the Netherlands.

Apparently such policy would not apply for emigrants. Would native Dutch people be able to share their loyalty? In case of Guus Hiddink (whom is the coach of the Russian national football team), this doesn't seem to be important.

To me this discussion is just a sign of a lack of self-confidence. If a government would need to demand loyalty from its citizens, then something is wrong with the country. What would be the next step after handing in your second passport? Would school children need to sing the national anthem in their classes each day? It all makes me think of non-democratic societies, where self-determination slowly becomes inferior to the needs of the nation. These nervous attempts seem to derive from an ignorance that young people increasingly feel that their identities are constructed from European or global symbols. And this development is not something of the past years, globalization simply has led to a redefinition of identities.

I haven't seen as much patriotism in the Netherlands as during the past weeks. During hopeless attempts to win the European Football championship many streets were coloured orange and red/white/blue, our national colours. Something seemed to unite citizens. Next to our national colours the Turkish national colour (red) is still very visible, as Turkey is still in the run to win the Championship. Maybe it makes some of our politicians happy that many Turks have two flags hanging out of their window: the Turkish flag and the Dutch flag. Now that is what I call shared loyalty!

So when I'll visit Istanbul next week and shall try to learn the Turkish anthem by heart, and sing for my fellow-citizens with the red flags!

17.6.08

Example








Recently I have been a faithless blogger! Today however Pieter's blog inspired me to catch up again. I guess that the last six months generally can be charactarized by saying that I exchanged IGLYO for more personal-quality-in-life. I've been trying hard to work less, which slowly is paying-of.
In the past months I visited New York twice, most recently last week. Even though these trips were for professional reason, I must confess my profound love for this city! The traffic, the smell, the people, the weather: everything made me love the city.
Well, following Pieter's good example I above share photo's from nice locations that I've visited recently. Top-down: Ibiza, Moscow, Tirana, Geneva, New York and Salzburg. In all those places I reunited with old friends or met new wonderful people, so truly all moments to cherish.
This weekend I visited Dennis in Strasbourg. Together with Juul and Kris we spent two wonderful days together. We ate delicious food and strawled through the silent streets of the city. As Juul and I both are allergic to cat we had the nice chance of camping in Dennis garden.

15.1.08

Kickstart

Last weekend the new IGLYO board visited Amsterdam for a handover board meeting. An amazing team - because they seemed still relax and happy after they discussed all the things coming up in the coming years...! I'm happy that the meeting took place - becuase now they can start with the real work, and I can take more distance from the work.

That is not a luxury - becuase the new year started with many new tasks. Increasingly I'm doing activities supporting the international policy development of COC NL - wonderful work! Next week I and Joyce will travel to NYC to further clarify our application for ECOSOC status to the NGO committee. Exciting, not only because this process has proven to be difficult for LGBT organisations in the past, but also because it's my very first time at the other side of the Atlantic! Those who read Dutch can follow our activities: http://www.publiek.coc.nl/weblog/.

Soon I will start a program with D66, my political party. The program will enable me to get to know better the party, as well to better understand the organisation of politics in the Netherlands. Exciting!

Happily I enjoyed a nice season break in Amsterdam, Munich and Salzburg!

5.1.08

The year of new opportunities!





And suddenly it is already 2008. A short lookback on 2007.

From L to R and T to B: Goa - India; Amsterdam - Netherlands; Istanbul - Turkey; Goa - India; Bled - Slovenia; Bishkek mountains - Kyrgyzstan; Odessa - Ukraine; Cyprus; Malaga - Spain; Bombay - India; Pyrenees - Spain; Istanbul - Turkey.

10.12.07

IGLYO's new dream team

Back home I try to look back on the last week. Four years suddenly feel like four months, or four weeks. I'm parting from something that shaped me so much - I'm happy, sad and proud at the same time.

A dream came true. IGLYO members adopted documents that will guide IGLYO into the future. A solid strategic plan, fresh statutes and new internal regulations and strong workplans for the coming three years were adopted on impressive consensus basis and with much support.

The educational guidelines were finished and debated. Representatives of COLEGAS, Fransesco de la Torre (mayor of Malaga) and Michael Cashman (chair of the LGBT intergroup in the European Parliament) came to opent he meeting.

And most important: a dream team was elected. I am confident that they will guide IGLYO further into its future.

Augustus, Bruno, Claire, Ilke, Lucy, Nanna and Simon: wishing you good luck!

9.12.07

So long IGLYO!

Dear friends,

A little bit more than four years ago I traveled to Lisbon. For the first time in my life I went to a real conference, for the first time in my life somebody paid my ticket. I didn’t really know what to expect, except that I understood the topic of the conference was ‘pride’. We slept the whole week in a hostel and the conference took place in a small community centre in Lisbon. For me it was to become the most special week of my life. Back home I tried to explain what IGLYO had done with me – but it was so hard to explain. One week of spending time with like minded people – one week of full dedication and energy.

Now, four years later I stand in front of you here in Malaga to say goodbye. To say goodbye from an organization that has played such an important part of my life. I had the privilege to work for an organization that is very unique. Like many other people: I became a bit of IGLYO…and slowly IGLYO became also a little bit of me. After these days I have the full confidence, that IGLYO will continue to become a bit of you – and that is what the truth strength of IGLYO is: a youth organization that knows what it works for.

It was a conviction that I should do this work, that I should take on the challenge of supporting an organization which does not know much of it equals. The conviction however did not come from inside. It came from you. It came from stories of exclusion, stories of injustice, spoken by brave, courageous people – people whom when they got together develop magic amounts of energy.

Four years have passed away now – they feel like a few months. Many challenges we have faced, and many challenges will also remain. Our belief and your inspiration helped us reconstructing the organization to what we are today: a well respected partner in the field of European Youth affairs.

IGLYO can not do without its volunteers. In the past years I had the lucky opportunity to work with many. Too many to thank all in person, but a few I want to thank. In particular the people that I started working with: Ruth, Jasna and Jelena. Those who started with me in this board: Maxence and Beverley. Those who work with me now, and still bear with my endless demands: Fabio, Darren, Lucy and Bruno. For you I have a little present to remember this meeting.

But also I thank people from outside, whom helped me reflect and have given me assistance and inspiration when I needed that. Evelyne, Judit, Bettina and Dennis: without you this work would very likely not have been possible.

I believe there is a future for IGLYO. Many of the numerous activists that once were part of IGLYO are now part of other important human rights organizations. The strategic plans and the commitment that have been show during this meeting gives me hope for considerable work to be carried out in the coming years. The confidence and trust that are given to the new board are an important asset in that, and I hope that the new board will continue building partnerships and encourage cooperation with youth organizations, and other organizations. Together we stand strong.

But dear friends, it is also my duty to share with you also my concerns. The work pressure on a small group of volunteers is enormous. This small group of people is too often characterized by their Western-European citizenships. Activists from other regions of Europe are extremely occupied by running their local and national movements – often already as volunteers. This creates a geographical power imbalance which needs to be challenged. We can not continue letting go the great contributions that young people from all regions in Europe can make.

At the same time there continues to be a lack of resources. The potential opening of an office next year will slightly improve the work conditions of the preceeding board. But let’s not create an air bubble: one person will not be able to run the complete administration and carry out the organization of events. The amount of work continues to increase, and this needs to be tackled. You all have an important role in this. I believe that only by showing vision, unity and true leadership we can expect this support to increase in the coming years.

Many efforts have been made to raise IGLYO’s profile in the past years – to position IGLYO in such way that both the number of activities engaging members can grow, the policy development can improve and extend, as well the capacity to accept an increasing amount of important partnerships can be developed. This work has to continue. We have to react on the policy developments in the EU, the Council of Europe, the OSCE and the UN, in order to create better standards for the realities of young people. We need to target our actions, and I am convinced that the new board will be helped by the existence of a strategic plan that will allos them to focus and target their energies.

But foremost, let’s not forget why we do this work. Our meetings have demonstrated repeatedly the unacceptable situation in which young LGBT people still find themselves daily. Why is the 14-year old Danny, living in a small village of the Netherlands, being criticized for being gay? Because many people in the Netherlands feel that at this age he can’t be sure about his sexual orientation yet. Self-determination is an important aspect of human rights principles that we need to advocate for.
Why is 19-year old Denise in Bulgaria forced to work and leave home? Because her parents wouldn’t take care of her anymore after she came out. We need to build project around intercultural and inter-religious dialogue – to ensure a better understanding of whom we are.
Why are numerous schools still refusing to discuss LGBT issues in their curricula, herewith contributing to social exclusion of LGBT young people? And when can these schools be kept accountable for the mental damage that they herewith cause? When can these schools be kept accountable for the isolation that they cause, isolation sometimes leading to suicide?

And then I do not speak even about the situation of young people elsewhere in the world. IGLYO is the only international LGBTQ Youth organization of this seize world wide. Why? Because we have it relatively good. Let’s not forget that. Let’s not forget that we carry a responsibility towards the situation of LGBTQ young people elsewhere in the world.


Dear friends, I must say that saying goodbye hurts. It helps to know that there is a new competent and enthusiastic board waiting to take over. I want to wish the new board a lot of luck with their work, I am confident that they will further guide IGLYO in the directions that we are needed to go. I have two little presents that should give some luck to the next board. I hope they will stay with IGLYO, and that the new board will give these presents to the new board.

One present is from Darren, Fabio and me. It’s a mirror for the new office, so that we can always remember whom we are working for. \

The other present is something more personal. It is a piece of the homo-monument in Amsterdam. A place where I often go to eat a sandwich for lunch. The triangle next to the Westerchurch in Amsterdam represents past, present and future. It commemorates those that became victim of who they are. In the summer tourists rest on the monument without knowing what the monument is – it makes it just a part of the environment. There is a text on the monument which still is a dream to so many young lgbt people in the world, it reads ‘to friendship, such an endless longing’.

It provided me with much inspiration, hope and perspective. I hope this piece of stone will bring the same to you.

Dear friends, thank you for all the great work and experiences in the past years. I wish you all the best for your future work and hope to be able to continue working with many of you.


So long, IGLYO!

Something inside so strong

The higher you build your barriers
The taller I become
The further you take my rights away
The faster I will run

You can deny me
You can decide to turn your face away
No matter 'cause there's ...
Something inside so strong
I know that I can make it

Though you're doing me wrong, so wrong
You thought that my pride was gone... oh noT
here's something inside so strong
Something inside so strong

The more you refuse to hear my voice
The louder I will sing
You hide behind walls of Jericho
Your lies will come tumbling
Deny my place in time
You squander wealth that's mine
My light will shine so brightly it will blind you

Because there's ...

Brothers and sisters
When they insist we're just not good enough
Well, we know better
Just look 'em in the eyes and say
We're gonna do it anyway
We're gonna do it anyway ...

because there's...

4.12.07

To change

These weeks are a bit awkward. Friday the General Meeting of Members start - for IGLYO a next step into a promising future. A considerable amount of members will gather to discuss on the future directions of the organisation. An exciting moment.... and I'm quite confident that the future of IGLYO will look well, looking at the candidates that stand for elections.

For me it's the end of an important but crazy ride in my life. Being involved with IGLYO did change my life a lot... and working towards this meeting feels like going to leave something of myself behind. I will do considerably less youth work, and that will feel strange. But foremost I will miss working with all these great people that I've met in the past years.

But it will also bring positive changes to me. Time to spend more time with friends in the Netherlands, time to go to the gym, time to study French and time to be lazy.

14.11.07

Statutes

A while ago I and Cristian visited the Museum Beelden aan Zee in Scheveningen. Tom Otterness has a fixed exhibition at the sea side, called Miracles at Sea. The displayed statutes are adorable -which represent fairy tales. Scheveningen beach is already a nice place to be (I spent many wonderful years working at the Northern part of the beach) - but this exhibition makes it an even better experience.

12.11.07

Back to school

A few weeks ago I attended a reunion at my high school in Amersfoort. My high-school period was a time of mixed feelings: experiencing nasty treats of freaked pupils during my first year, but meeting many friends in consecutive years. Looking back my time at the Farel college overall was very nice.

Schools are strange places to be, they take such a decissive role in shaping our lives. During the first year I sometimes had sink in my shoes when entering the schoolyard. I looked up to the popular groups of smoking and swearing young people, often terrorizing the environment for those who did not fit their vision on reality. They led to a seperation of groups of young people, the popular and the not so popular. And so it turned that my best friend from primary school ended up in the popular club, and I ended up in the impopular club. To keep up his own reputation he then had to kick me during the terribly ritual week openings (I attended a Christian school), pretending that he did that as I reaction to me beating him. It made me want to stay at home.

In the second year it seemed that people gave up their ideas on belonging to a certain group. Their identies became increasingly constructed on rather individual characteristics, moving away from common group values which made it necessary to harass individuals that they could not identify with. It removed my fears and opened space for me to develop myself, while sticking to my own identity and not having to act cool anymore.

Slowly I started enjoying school. Slowly those who had been popular once, started to become impopular. I became secure, they remained uncertain. Then I started participating in school bodies, participating in a Bertolt Brecht play and organising school parties. All was I think very perfect than, except from one thing: I did not dare to come out. Where others started responding to their puberty needs, I was confused about my own feelings. There was no possible way of me coming out the closet, I did not experience school as a place to do so.

At the reunion I saw a lot of people that I didn't see for a long time. It was somehow a bit strange. It was nice to see some people again, but it was strange to experience that teachers -whom I experienced as having played an important role in my development - did not even remember your name anymore.

Below a picture with Kees - whom I see way too little!

8.11.07

Morning dew

When the streets are still empty and dew is covering the fields. I have always enjoyed the morning silence. The morning can be like a little secret - a state-of-art that you do not have to share with all those people that are still sleeping. The nature awakes a bit earlier than I tend to do - but is in such beautiful peace at morning.

The last days I woke up early naturally - probably as a result of changing my clock a few times throughout the past week.

6.11.07

Reflection

The last weeks are extremely busy - little time for reflections! But I have enjoyed these weeks extremely... they've been inspiring and charged me for the last weeks of the year to come. Some Cypriotic reflection I captured that I can't stop looking at below!

If I were a poet

I would live my life with words
Rephrase the sense of being
Understand vocabular of love
Listen songs of sadness
I would live my life with words
Just
If I were a poet